On the first day of Christmas Miss Livingstone gave to me,
A paper on archaeology;
On the second day of Christmas Miss Livingstone gave to me
Two exploding pens;
On the third day of Christmas Miss Livingstone gave to me,
Three shepherds pies;
On the fourth day of Christmas Miss Livingstone gave to me,
Four whippy canes;
On the fifth day of Christmas Miss Livingstone gave to me,
Five unctuous Beaks;
On the sixth day of Christmas Miss Livingstone gave to me,
Six straps a cracking:
On the seventh day of Christmas Miss Livingstone gave to me:
Seven sorts of jelly:
On the eighth day of Christmas Miss Livingstone gave to me,
Eight spoons a-flicking;
On the ninth day of Christmas Miss Livingstone gave to me
Nine Beaks a whipping:
On the tenth day of Christmas Miss Livingstone gave to me,
Ten puppets prancing;
On the eleventh day of Christmas Miss Livingstone gave to me,
Eleven fairies dancing;
On the twelfth day of Christmas Miss Livingstone gave to me,
Twelve pupils singing.
Sunday, 18 December 2011
Thursday, 3 November 2011
Night of the Cane
We had a small contingent of New Grange Manor pupils at NOTC last Saturday. Myself, Tommy Mac, Chris and Andrew all turned up together with Miss Livingstone and Mr Holmes. Tommy, and the boys and me had to go to the school lessons. We had a rather interesting lesson with a Miss Barclay-Stevens on creative writing. Well, Tommy appeared half way through the lesson on account of Miss L had got caught up in traffic. During a break we managed to souse a Headmaster of our acquaintance, ol Jonesy, with our water pistols. He chased me into the classroom but all I got were three light taps off a borrowed cane, there just wasn't the room for a decent swing, so I reckon I got off lightly!
The next lesson we attended was taken by Miss Prim from Muir Academy. The Muir is going to be 25 years old next year.....quite an achievement. I thought that maybe Miss Prim had forgotten me, so when she asked if anybody present didn't know who she was, I stuck my hand up! Unfortunately she remembered me only too well and I got a swingeing whack across the hand off her small tawse for my cheek! We did a Shakespeare test during that lesson. Modesty almost decrees that I shouldn't say who got the top mark, but pride in NGM insists that I point out that I achieved eleven and a half marks out of twelve!! Mr Holmes had given us a rather interesting lesson on Shakespeare a few terms ago, and contrary to popular opinion amongst the Beaks, I do listen in class!
Tommy and I didn't particularly want to watch the caning competition, so after attaching a couple of pegs to Miss Prim's coat, we sat upstairs chatting and putting the world to rights. The competition was duly run, and the cup awarded to the winners, and I prepared to pack my stuff into my satchel as my Guardian wanted to get me home. Miss Prim in the meantime had spotted the pegs, and do you know, dear readers, despite their being zillions of pupils there, (well a couple of dozen or so), she simply bawled out "Bethany Grant!" and sent a lad to fetch me to her! Anyone would think I had a reputation for mischief. Retribution was swift, and suitably er....suited to the crime! But all in all a good evening, although I understand that Mr Jones is still gunning for me. But hey ho chums, it gives a bit of challenge to life don't you think?
Bethany Grant
The next lesson we attended was taken by Miss Prim from Muir Academy. The Muir is going to be 25 years old next year.....quite an achievement. I thought that maybe Miss Prim had forgotten me, so when she asked if anybody present didn't know who she was, I stuck my hand up! Unfortunately she remembered me only too well and I got a swingeing whack across the hand off her small tawse for my cheek! We did a Shakespeare test during that lesson. Modesty almost decrees that I shouldn't say who got the top mark, but pride in NGM insists that I point out that I achieved eleven and a half marks out of twelve!! Mr Holmes had given us a rather interesting lesson on Shakespeare a few terms ago, and contrary to popular opinion amongst the Beaks, I do listen in class!
Tommy and I didn't particularly want to watch the caning competition, so after attaching a couple of pegs to Miss Prim's coat, we sat upstairs chatting and putting the world to rights. The competition was duly run, and the cup awarded to the winners, and I prepared to pack my stuff into my satchel as my Guardian wanted to get me home. Miss Prim in the meantime had spotted the pegs, and do you know, dear readers, despite their being zillions of pupils there, (well a couple of dozen or so), she simply bawled out "Bethany Grant!" and sent a lad to fetch me to her! Anyone would think I had a reputation for mischief. Retribution was swift, and suitably er....suited to the crime! But all in all a good evening, although I understand that Mr Jones is still gunning for me. But hey ho chums, it gives a bit of challenge to life don't you think?
Bethany Grant
Sunday, 25 September 2011
Night-time Frolics.
One of the most exciting parts of boarding school are the Midnight Feasts, and after Lights Out mischief that we get up to.
On the first night we were all really tired. We had a small confab, and decided that we would go to bed and go to sleep for the first night, to recharge our batteries. In actual fact, Chris crept downstairs after Lights Out and left about four plastic cups, with a trace of alcohol and a number of sweet wrappers on the common room floor. The rest of us slept on, wrapped in innocent slumbers! I gather that Miss Livingstone did try and keep awake, listening for us, but to no avail. On Saturday morning we were asked about the "Midnight Feast" but of course we all looked blank, and genuinely asserted our innocence!
Saturday night was different. We gave the Beaks plenty of time to get to sleep and duly crept down the stairs. We had to get down the first set of stairs from the pupils' floor to the Beaks' floor, then creep down the main staircase to the ground floor. We decided to have our Feast in the Staff Room. Although it was out of bounds, it was much more comfortable than the pupils' common room, and we were being so naughty anyway we thought we might as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb. We had lots of scrummy nosh, pork pies, biscuits, crisps, sweets, and nice things to drink, I had wine with lemonade, and there was beer and cider. We were chatting away, putting the world to rights when the door suddenly opened and Mr Melman appeared. It gave us a bit of a fright, I can tell you. We tried to incriminate him by offering to share the food and drink with him, but he was having none of it. He told us to pack everything up, then put us over the bench for six strokes of the strap before sending us back to bed. All in all it was worth it........
The following night we thought we might be safer. Mr Melman had had to depart to real life earlier that evening, and once Mr Malcolm was asleep nothing would waken him.
We still had a fair bit of food left over from the previous night's feast, plus more alcohol, so we got stuck in. There were fewer of us, as some of the pupils were just too tired and had stayed in bed asleep. We were a bit tired too, so we decided that we would try and get back to bed by 1am so as to get a few hours unbroken sleep. We had decided we would try the ultimate in naughtiness, and throw noise makers into Miss Livingstone's room and outside Mr Malcolm's room on the way back up to our beds. However, the best laid plans of mice and men..........
We were just about to pack up when the door opened and Miss Livingstone stood there, warmly clad in a dressing gown, and clutching a cane. There wasn't really an awful lot we could say, except ouch when we were over the bench getting six...... Michelle, Sarah and I arrived on the first floor first, Tommy was explaining cider to Miss Livingstone downstairs at the time. We decided to hide in Mr Melman's (empty) room and chuck noisemakers in the beaks' rooms. Unfortunately Miss L came bounding up the stairs. Michelle was caught on the landing, I was just coming out of Miss L's room and Sarah had dived into the bathroom. Sarah tried to tell Miss L that she had had an urgent need for the loo, but unfortunately that bathroom didn't contain a toilet, that was in a separate stall next door! So that was another six and an order to get to bed.
We trotted upstairs, and hung about for another ten minutes or so. Tommy was up and ready, Michelle had just popped to the loo and Sarah was still in the dorm when I crept along the top corridor. I'd suggested that we went down both sets of stairs, so that at least one of us would make it to the Beaks' floor. I opted to go down the far stairs and clutching a noisemaker in my hands I scuttled along the corridor to the top of the stairs. You can imagine my horror, dear readers, to find Miss Livingstone standing on the bend of the stairs, with a face like a gorgon. I legged it back down the corridor to my dorm yelling "Cave, Beaks" but Miss L followed me relentlessly. I had to go over the end of the bed, and received a further six which entailed me having to lie on my tummy for about five minutes before I could roll over and go to sleep! We did get the noisemakers into the lobby by Mr Malcolm's room, but he didn't appear, thankfully, and we had to wait until after breakfast before we received retribution for that! Midnight Feasts are such fun!
Bethany
On the first night we were all really tired. We had a small confab, and decided that we would go to bed and go to sleep for the first night, to recharge our batteries. In actual fact, Chris crept downstairs after Lights Out and left about four plastic cups, with a trace of alcohol and a number of sweet wrappers on the common room floor. The rest of us slept on, wrapped in innocent slumbers! I gather that Miss Livingstone did try and keep awake, listening for us, but to no avail. On Saturday morning we were asked about the "Midnight Feast" but of course we all looked blank, and genuinely asserted our innocence!
Saturday night was different. We gave the Beaks plenty of time to get to sleep and duly crept down the stairs. We had to get down the first set of stairs from the pupils' floor to the Beaks' floor, then creep down the main staircase to the ground floor. We decided to have our Feast in the Staff Room. Although it was out of bounds, it was much more comfortable than the pupils' common room, and we were being so naughty anyway we thought we might as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb. We had lots of scrummy nosh, pork pies, biscuits, crisps, sweets, and nice things to drink, I had wine with lemonade, and there was beer and cider. We were chatting away, putting the world to rights when the door suddenly opened and Mr Melman appeared. It gave us a bit of a fright, I can tell you. We tried to incriminate him by offering to share the food and drink with him, but he was having none of it. He told us to pack everything up, then put us over the bench for six strokes of the strap before sending us back to bed. All in all it was worth it........
The following night we thought we might be safer. Mr Melman had had to depart to real life earlier that evening, and once Mr Malcolm was asleep nothing would waken him.
We still had a fair bit of food left over from the previous night's feast, plus more alcohol, so we got stuck in. There were fewer of us, as some of the pupils were just too tired and had stayed in bed asleep. We were a bit tired too, so we decided that we would try and get back to bed by 1am so as to get a few hours unbroken sleep. We had decided we would try the ultimate in naughtiness, and throw noise makers into Miss Livingstone's room and outside Mr Malcolm's room on the way back up to our beds. However, the best laid plans of mice and men..........
We were just about to pack up when the door opened and Miss Livingstone stood there, warmly clad in a dressing gown, and clutching a cane. There wasn't really an awful lot we could say, except ouch when we were over the bench getting six...... Michelle, Sarah and I arrived on the first floor first, Tommy was explaining cider to Miss Livingstone downstairs at the time. We decided to hide in Mr Melman's (empty) room and chuck noisemakers in the beaks' rooms. Unfortunately Miss L came bounding up the stairs. Michelle was caught on the landing, I was just coming out of Miss L's room and Sarah had dived into the bathroom. Sarah tried to tell Miss L that she had had an urgent need for the loo, but unfortunately that bathroom didn't contain a toilet, that was in a separate stall next door! So that was another six and an order to get to bed.
We trotted upstairs, and hung about for another ten minutes or so. Tommy was up and ready, Michelle had just popped to the loo and Sarah was still in the dorm when I crept along the top corridor. I'd suggested that we went down both sets of stairs, so that at least one of us would make it to the Beaks' floor. I opted to go down the far stairs and clutching a noisemaker in my hands I scuttled along the corridor to the top of the stairs. You can imagine my horror, dear readers, to find Miss Livingstone standing on the bend of the stairs, with a face like a gorgon. I legged it back down the corridor to my dorm yelling "Cave, Beaks" but Miss L followed me relentlessly. I had to go over the end of the bed, and received a further six which entailed me having to lie on my tummy for about five minutes before I could roll over and go to sleep! We did get the noisemakers into the lobby by Mr Malcolm's room, but he didn't appear, thankfully, and we had to wait until after breakfast before we received retribution for that! Midnight Feasts are such fun!
Bethany
Tuesday, 20 September 2011
The Fun we had
We arrived at the venue and helped to take in all the bits and pieces then went up to our dorms to get changed. Michelle and I were allowed to wear our summer dresses for the evening, the bottle green gingham ones with the little white collar. That was much more comfortable than shirt and ties. I was awfully excited about being there and I got a bit over excited and answered Mr Malcolm back so I think I was first in the Staff room when it came to being sent there for a whacking. He was very kind though, I got a dozen with the strap rather than any off that ghastly smoked dragon of his!
Dinner was a bit late cos Mr Tesco hadn't delivered everything that Miss Livingstone had ordered, including the ingredients for Friday's menu! So she and Mr Reamon had to go foraging.
Bethany
Dinner was a bit late cos Mr Tesco hadn't delivered everything that Miss Livingstone had ordered, including the ingredients for Friday's menu! So she and Mr Reamon had to go foraging.
Bethany
Monday, 19 September 2011
Michelle's Door Posters
Michelle decided to brighten up the school premises by attaching various posters to doors around the place. In the interests of modesty, Miss Liversausage's picture now sports a large sunflower to cover her embarrassment. As for the picture of Mr Malcolm, Michelle's assertion, "Mr Malcolm, World's Weakest Teacher" does have a touch of irony about it. Mr Malcolm is indeed a practised wielder of implements, (and I think a lot of the practice was performed on my nether regions) and one of the fiercest teachers I know! I only have to glimpse him removing his smoked dragon from the implement bag and I find myself pleading for leniency. He's a tad deaf too.....!
Bethany Grant
Door Posters
Michelle decided to brighten up the school premises with various door posters. I thought I would share a couple of them with you all. In the interests of modesty, Miss Liversausage now sports a large sunflower, and I really must point out that "Mr Malcolm, World's Weakest Teacher" is definitely the biggest understatement ever. The man is practised with both rattan and leather. In fact I think he did most of his practising on my nether regions........ He certainly kept me in line, one glimpse of that smoked dragon and I was actually pleading for leniency. Not that that cut any ice, he is one of the fiercest teachers I know!
Boarding School
Boarding school was excellent! The weekends just get better and better as we smooth off the corners. Just now I'm a tad tired, and my eye and ankle hurt. I got an infection in my eye, and something nasty has bitten my ankle and made it swell a bit, so I shall have a good night's sleep and let you unfortunate souls who missed the weekend into some of the secrets of our success! It's a bit like the chappies on St Crispin's Day, there were eight of us pupils, five teachers and two catering staff who didn't lie abed but went forth to do battle!
Bethany Grant
Bethany Grant
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